Broken Circle
by Xenoglossy
Summary: Riddles, answers, despair and lies all in the winding, dusty halls of Eriol's British manner. Just how long can Syaoran keep running? (E/Sy)


**PRE FIC RANTINGS AND A SPRINKLE OF DISCLAIMER:** Sammy is dead. Gone gone gone gone gone. You need to know this because the fact that I am mourning in a way explains this fic. It's dark, dark, dark and weird, weird, weird. Don't worry if you don't get what's going on the first time. Read it through, read the afterword and then read it again. And then cry a few tears for me because Sammy is dead. This is officially the first fic written on my _new_ computer (a Pentium 2... or 3... or something!!), Adlehyde, or Addy for short.  
**WARNINGS:** Violent, slashy and full of lime. Told out of order. E/Sy. And I don't own it. And I like the hats in _'Pirates of the Caribbean'_. And I did not spell caribbean right. ============================================================= Broken Circles  
Izzy Girl ;Catalyst The kiss itself was not the catalyst, neither was the fight nor the words exchanged before hand. The words, were simply a product of Syaoran's abrasive and easily offended personality and considering the events surrounding them, the fight was inevitable. The kiss was a whim, really, and the obvious outcome. Even if there were no words, no fight and no blood, there was still something repressed and powerful lurking just below the surface of the tense confrontation. The kiss most likely would have happened anyways- though, it must be noted, lacking in such dramatic circumstances it would most likely have remained just that- a kiss. Something to be ruminated over by Eriol and forgotten in a flurry of denial and blushes by Syaoran. However, these were the actions leading up to the event: a few choice, muttered insults and a smug reply. Syaoran drawing his sword only to be knocked senseless by a much wiser and quicker Eriol. The sound of Syaoran's head slamming up against the wall muffled the dull clatter of his sword hitting the ground. Eriol pulled back and Syaoran made a swing at him that grazed the cheek and sent his glasses flying. Eriol grabbed his shoulder a bit _too_ firmly and pinned him against the wall. A gasp from Syaoran and then his lips were covered in a rough and violent kiss. The catalyst was the low moan of pleasure that rumbled at the back Syaoran's throat that gave away the fact he was enjoying himself. Eriol broke away smiling sardonically and touched the back of Syaoran's head. When he pulled it back, it was coated in blood. Syaoran winced, because the pain was just beginning to set in. Eriol traced three bloodstained fingers down the chinese boy's dark cheek and murmured: "Now that's a good little wolf." this time, when Eriol kissed him, Syaoran closed his eyes. ;Lessons "What time is it?" The thing about Eriol's house was that it was always sealed shut and pitch black so that neither day nor night seeped in. "Nevermind that, Xiao Lang, just concentrate." Syaoran grumbled and returned his attention to the elaborately crafted illusion before him, searching for the subtle hints and gaps that would unravel it. Truthfully, he did not know exactly what the illusion was- but he was sure when he found a way to unravel it, it would reveal itself. As if the mage were reading his mind, Eriol spoke up, "You need to know what is the illusion before you destroy it, Xiao Lang," he sighed and looked up lazily from his book, "Western magic is quite... blunt compared to eastern magic. It's all based in the physical world of what we can or cannot see." he paused, "Find the illusion first, then undo it. That is the proper order of things." "You're being redundant." Syaoran growled, "It's distracting." "Indeed." "You're enjoying this, aren't you?" "Immensely." Eriol hid a faint grin behind the brim of his novel. Syaoran closed his eyes, dropping his sword and his charms along with his arms. He focused on the room, turning slowly and picturing each piece of furniture in his mind until he found something that just did not feel _right_, "That's the way to do it. You're a quick learner." "Shut up!" Syaoran snapped, his spiritual gaze landing on Eriol, folded in his chair, "Are you masking your aura?" he demanded. Eriol looked at him innocently, "What do you think?", and his eyes smiled behind his glasses... _'The glasses, that's it!_' Syaoran dropped his sword and crossed the room before Eriol could prove his hypothesis wrong, and ripped the mage's glasses from his face. The illusion dissolved, book and all, and the real Eriol materialized in the center of the room, clapping. Syaoran spun in time to see the British boy glance dramatically at a watch he was not wearing. "Seventeen minutes and thirty eight seconds," he tsk'ed, "Disappointing. I thought it was a rather transparent ploy." "Oh, it was real clever creating such a complicated riddle. Complete the lesson plan only to discover the teacher isn't really there." Syaoran scoffed and collected his sword protectively, "The book was a nice touch, too. I noticed you reading the exact same one this morning." Eriol smiled graciously, "And I noticed you noticing." "I guess the game's always on, then. No rest for the wicked or the weary." "Xiao Lang," Eriol began with a slight frown, "You seem... displeased." Syaoran leaned against the hilt of his sword and rolled his eyes towards the ceiling, "What time is it?" "I can't tell you that." "Another lesson?" "Maybe." "Okay, then I'll guess... midnight." "No." "Noon." "Wrong again." "Three fourty five AM." "Closer." A hint of pleading entered Syaoran's tone, "Can I go home?" Eriol shook his head slowly, "You're the one who requested that I train you. We have a bargain, Xiao Lang. You can't leave until you've solved the last riddle." Syaoran sighed, "Can I sleep?" Eriol shook his head again, his lack of apology increasing in his manner with every word spoken, "Not until you tell me what time it is." "There's no clocks in this house, are there?" "Use your instincts, Xiao Lang." Eriol murmured, then disappeared. ;Hospital "I'm leaving for a while." "Why?" Hesitation, "My... mother." "That's a lie." No answer. "I know you better than that." pause, "It's not your fault." Too quickly, "I thought it might be interesting to... uh, er... well I'm going to study magic with Hiiragizawa in England." "Your mother's idea?" skepticism. "An... no, it was mine." "It really wasn't your fault." Looks away. "When will you be back?" A cough, "I don't know. I guess when I'm dismissed." "Will you be coming home?" "Ah... I guess Meiling will want me to. We haven't seen each other for-" "That's not what I meant." "Oh..." "Well?" "... I don't know. I have some... things to work through and I... well..." "Hmm. I think I understand." "... I'm sorry." "You don't need to be." beat, "It wasn't your fault." "You already said that." "It can't be said enough." "... look, can we talk about something else?" "Syaoran..." ;Words "It's not real." Syaoran exclaimed, "That's the answer! It's not real. I've solved the riddle, now let me go." Eriol raised a dark eyebrow, "That's an interesting conclusion, Xiao Lang. How did you come up with that one?" "Ruby and Spinel. Where are your guardians? And it's always night here. And there's no exit." Syaoran narrowed his eyes, "Now either let me go or let me sleep. I don't care." Eriol laughed. A rare event, little more than a tremor in the shoulders and a low chuckle in the throat. He paced closer and caught Syaoran's gaze, "First of all," he said firmly, "I asked you to solve the riddles in the order that you're given them, so even if your answer was correct I could not, under the bindings of our agreement, allow you to leave. Second, your answer is incorrect. Thirdly, you have failed to tell me the time, therefore the spell preventing you from sleeping will not be lifted." "This isn't tutoring!" Syaoran cried helplessly, "It's torture!" " 'Nothing worth having comes without a cost'." Eriol quoted wearily. "Even if the cost is your pride?" "Your pride is what brought you here." Eriol commented, "You could stand to lose even just a bit of it." Syaoran blinked and said in a very small voice, "It wasn't my fault." he swallowed deeply, wondering if those were tears he _almost_ felt forming, "Sakura told me that before I left. It wasn't my fault." "And you didn't believe her?" Syaoran's gaze snapped up in shock, "What? What do you mean by that." Eriol shrugged, "Hmm. Nothing." "_Nothing_? You obviously meant something. What was it!?" Syaoran wasn't prepared to meet Eriol's void-dark eyes, sky-gray and reflecting emotions like swings in the weather, only Syaoran wasn't sure who's emotions they were reflecting- Eriol's, or his own. "I meant that I'm only as hard on you as you are on yourself." Eriol's tone was dead even and nearly monotone, "You have a heavy conscious, Xiao Lang. I'm only nursing it with as much pain and torment you believe you deserve." Understanding almost flickered in between the words dancing in his mind, but for the most part, Syaoran was lost, "Are you trying to say I'm enjoying this?" "No. I'm trying to say that you think you deserve it." Syaoran was without reply, so Eriol continued, "You never fully explained to why you've come here. I'm an escape of sorts, aren't I?- you wanted pain and you realized that I would provide it." "Why would I want to be tortured?" "Well, maybe it was your fault." Syaoran's eyes widened and he felt his stomach fall and rise into his throat at the same time. He couldn't exactly pin down what he was feeling- was it dread, for perhaps Eriol was right; or maybe excitement because he no longer had to carry his secret, "Personally, I do not think it was your fault. It was inevitable, really, a simple but deadly mistake made by a young magician. Happens all the time. I think your real problem is that you're not as guilty as you want to be. Afterall, you were always jealous of Sakura-san." Everything fell back into place and Syaoran's eyes narrowed instinctively, mixed emotions settling on anger, "You want to repeat what you just said, Hiiraizawa?" Eriol remained placid, "I'll not only repeat it, but elaborate on the subject. You were always jealous of Sakura, Xiao Lang, and you cannot deny it without being untruthful. On top of that, she's always made you feel inadequate. It's almost as if she's stolen your family's eternal birthright and you just stood by helpless against the might of it all." "That's not true!" Syaoran interrupted loudly, panic edging his voice, "I love Sakura." "You were blinded and consumed by the light of her, master of the cards and now one of the most powerful magicians in the world. You could do nothing to change that and nothing to help her. You watched as she triumphed over obstacle after obstacle and emerged in the end a fully evolved and complete personality. You, Xiao Lang, are still chained to a destiny that was not meant for you. By loving Sakura, you're clinging to what little of it you can. Very self destructive behavior." "Shut up!" The words were processing. They were each turned over carefully in Syaoran's mind and defined and understood. The boy could even find some semblance of twisted truth in them, it was simply that he could not believe they were being said. He felt naked and violated. Eriol couldn't read hearts- he had no right. "I am sorry, Xiao Lang, I am simply noting what I have observed. A devoted lover does not run off halfway across the world when his beloved is lying in a hospital bed. He especially does not do this in order to be with someone he does not particularly like." "Didn't I tell you to shut up!?" Syaoran yelled, "You don't know what the hell you're talking about! This is just another one of your damned mental games! Everything's a game to you, you sadistic bastard." Syaoran closed the distance between himself and the mage in three steps and leaned in so close that their breath mingled, "You're just a dried up, reusable husk of a great man. You think I'm grasping for a destiny I can't reach you should take a look at yourself someday. You're not Clow. You're not even a pale shadow of him. You're just disillusioned, another cheap copy like Ruby Moon and Spinel Sun." Anyone else might have cried. Or hit Syaoran. Or at least turned away. But this was not 'anyone', it was Eriol Hiiragizawa and thus the mage did not flinch. He raised his right hand an placed it over his heart, "Ow, Xiao Lang," he replied, "I think that almost hurt." There was _something_ about Eriol's tone that sent Syaoran off the edge. The smug grin, the steady smile, the even tone. He growled out loud in frustration and without really thinking about his actions, drew his sword. He raised it and- ;Stars {Out on the edge of the manor's wide property, both back down in the field. The time is inconsequential (which Syaoran knows now, after having learned the hard way). Syaoran's eyes are half-lidded and Eriol's are trained on the sky.} "The stars are fascinating, don't you think?" Syaoran hmm'ed, not really listening. He was half-asleep and half concentrating on how he and Eriol's fingers entwined against the moonlight. Eriol spoke aimlessly anyways, never being one particularly in need of an audience. "Much has been said about the beauty of a night sky. Some compare it's glitter to the sparkle of a young maiden's eye. Others relate it's pattern to the slope of a healthy man's spine. Ancients used to trace these visions in the sky and we still remember them. Strange how connected we can still remain with the past." "I guess." pause, "What do you think?" Syaoran asked drowsily. "What do I think?" Eriol mused, "What do I think, what?" "About the stars. What do the stars say to you?" Eriol disentangled his fingers from Syaoran's and crossed his arms across his chest. He closed his eyes and smiled faintly, "You go first." Syaoran blinked, a bit put off by having his own question thrown back in his face. He struggled with the thought a moment before answering, "Magic, I guess?" Eriol allowed his eyes to fall open, raising one eyebrow, "Magic?" Syaoran nodded, "Mother taught me elemental magic in accordance with not only the chinese zodiac, but the Graeco-Roman as well." he help up his fingers in a complex weave against the sky and squinted through the gaps, "Right now Leo is approaching it's apex. It's a fire sign, but not a cardinal, so other elements are usable. However, it's still a tempt of fate to attempt air magic during the solstice and.... hey!" at some point Syaoran realize that Eriol was laughing at him. He turned over on his side and glared at the British boy harshly, "What's so funny?" Eriol touched Syaoran's face lightly, "You're very... predictable, is all Xiao Lang. And not very imaginative." "Oh." Syaoran huffed slightly and fell back. After a moment, he asked, "What do the stars make you think of, Hiiragizawa?" Eriol adjusted his glasses and sighed, "Death." "Death?" A nod, "Death." "... death?" Exasperated: "Yes, Xiao Lang, the stars make me think of death. Not dying, not the act of, but rather the state of being a non-living entity." "Oh." a beat, "It seems everything makes you think of death." "I suppose having died once already would have absolutely nothing to do with it?" "Of course not." silence, awkward, "Why..." hesitation, "Why do the stars make you think of death?" "Light moves so quickly in comparison to the dull, unsteady stumblings of humankind, and yet it may still take a millennium for it to reach our eyes." Eriol found Syaoran's hand again, almost unconsciously. He brought the two hands up in front of him and held them out, placing his thumb at the top edge of Syaoran's dark palm, "A star here is dead. It may have died ten thousand years ago." he dragged his thumb down the center of Syaoran's palm until it rested in the small of his hand. Syaoran shivered, "And here, we watch them burn and shimmer in all the glory of their life." Eriol settled his gaze on the slow spiral of Bellatrix at the edge of the rise of the milky way, "It's almost poetic in a way- stars are echoes of a past we could never dream of living, dead for centuries yet still as alive as ever to our infantile eyes. Also somewhat disturbing." "Also somewhat like someone I know." Syaoran did not often stop to ponder the words about to fall off his tongue. Whether this was because he was too busy thinking about something else, or because he was simply a coarse induvidual would forever remain a mystery to Eriol. These words hurt a bit. Quite a bit more than they should have, in fact. Eriol dropped Syaoran's hand and hoped that the boy was too tired to notice the sharp, strained edge in his otherwise playful tone, "Ah yes, I suppose that would be a viable description of..." he chuckled, self-depreciatively, "Of me. But at least I've paid my dues. You're more like a fallen star- burning yourself thin in one blazing flash of glory until all that's left is ash and the brief memory of your descent. While I linger on, you will crash and crumble in less than the time it takes me to blink. Perhaps I should try to save you, hmm Xiao Lang? What would it take for me to convince you to stop running." Syaoran sat up an shook his head wearily at Eriol, "I'm.... I..." he closed his eyes firmly, then reopened them, only to rub at them with bare wrists, "I'm too tired for this Hiiragizawa. Can... can I...?" Eriol sighed and dismissed the matter easily. He stood gracefully, brushing the grass off before excusing himself with a bow, "Goodnight, Xiao Lang." he winked knowingly, "Or perhaps that would be... good morning?" ;Words - swung it in a wide arc, only to have his wrist caught calmly by Eriol. The mage flung him against the wall casually and he felt a sharp pain in the back of his head. Fortunately, adrenaline did not allow him to feel the full brunt of the blow and he caught his footing again, quickly, swinging his fist forcefully and managing to bruise Eriol's flawless, pale cheek. The glasses went skidding across the floor and Syaoran was about to dive for his sword when he suddenly found himself pinned against the wall, panting. Eriol pressed against his shoulders, hard, the arches of his palms finding the cavities between bone and breast. Syaoran gasped for breath, but also gasped because their bodies were _so close_ and he was faintly aware of something- denial, hot breath and the need for something to _erase_- or maybe it was only Eriol's aura. Or the power of his dark, unreadable eyes. Or... something... and it seemed the mage was reading his mind again when he kissed him, only it wasn't in the slightest affectionate, just another blow in the battle and another step in the dance and Syaoran really, _really_ did not want to be enjoying it, only his subconscious had taken over and he found himself reaching to wrap lonely arms around his adversary's shoulders, only the kiss ended far too soon. Eriol smiled, not the usual knowing, condescending grin, but something maniacal and scheming. He ran a hand through Syaoran's hair, and it might have been tender, only that when he found the spot where skull had cracked against stone, he pressed down until Syaoran's body shuddered in pain. He traced three lines of blood across the chinese boy's cheek and whispered, lips to ear: "Now that's a good little wolf." Syaoran closed his eyes and dove into the kiss perhaps a bit _too_ ardently. He felt like he was sinking, drowning, really, in mistakes and in the secrets he kept from himself. Did he really want this? _Had_ he really wanted it all along? And if so, why hadn't he been informed? This part hurt, the part where his pride actually _did_ crumble. He felt as if he should say something in his own defense. "It's not true." he mumbled when Eriol broke away and began dragging him towards the bedroom, "Take it back." he pleaded, shirt buttons finding themselves undone, or ripped off, "I... I'm sorry," thrown back on the bed, weakly clutching at Eriol's waist and trembling. Next, a whisper, "Please, just take the pain away." Finally, Eriol replied. Oddly enough, he did so with a reassuring smile, "It's eight twenty three in the evening." When Syaoran woke up he realized that he hadn't actually been sleeping. Pain and satisfaction and confusion and escapism had all intersected in his brain so that his mind had found it impossible to function on a rational, sane level. Therefore, his mind decided to go out for a coffee break, giving the impression of unconsciousness, though when Syaoran rose- untangling himself from sheets and pale limbs- his bones ached and muscles froze and everything felt just as heavy and sluggish as they had before he'd confronted Eriol. He felt the passage of those hours bearing over him as he searched the dark room for his discarded clothing. _'It's eight twenty three in the evening...'_ Syaoran blinked, and straightened, "Three..." he said loudly, "Thee fourty four." "AM or PM?" Eriol wondered, rising from the crumpled mass of sheets. "AM, of course." "Very good, Xiao Lang." Syaoran turned, uncomfortably and refusing to meet Eriol's eyes, "You gave me a clue. A rather broad and obvious one. It was cheating." Eriol shook his head, edges of his lips turning up in an enigmatic grin, "No, no. Xiao Lang, haven't you realized yet that sometimes the true key to a riddle does not lie in the answer itself, but rather the way it is solved?" Syaoran furrowed his brow, "I don't underst..." "If you had not been under an anti-sleeping enchantment as a penalty, you would not have solved your time riddle for you would not have noticed the hours passing. You were only able to solve the riddle because you did not want to in the first place." Syaoran shot the mage an incredulous look, "That explanation sounds a bit too... convenient to me. Are you sure you didn't just make it up on the spot? And what about the fight. And..." he blushed and looked away again, "W... was that all part of the riddle too?" Eriol reached out a long, white arm and cupped Syaoran's cheek (the one still marked with three, red lines) in his hand, forcing the other boy to look at him, "Ah, now you're reading a bit too deep into things. Sweet dreams, Little Wolf." Syaoran Li fell asleep. ;Accidents There was fire. And there was screaming, and an accusatory glance from Touya and an apologetic grimace from Yukito/Yueh, and a sympathetic hand on the shoulder from the ever-solid-standing and composed Tomoyo. From Sakura, there was nothing except a blank-eyed stare. Vibrant green eyes dulled magically and a mouth sealed shut in shock. Syaoran could say nothing because from one angle he was seeing through Sakura's eyes. Where once there was life and color, now there was only black. Not even shades of gray, only the endlessness of the void. Only that wasn't right, because magically induced blindness was always white and glowing, which in a way was worse because even in sleep, the closure of the darkness never came. So Syaoran wasn't really seeing through Sakura's eyes, so perhaps he wasn't really feeling her pain. And perhaps he wasn't really feeling sympathy because as much as he clutched her small frame in his arms as she stared past him blankly, or held her hand in the stillness of the hospital room, or talked to her in quiet tones, all he could think was... was... was... ;Circle Eriol was humming and it was distracting Syaoran from his mental training, which was most likely deliberate. He pressed his eyelids together and tightened his grip on the hilt of his sword attempting to ignore the annoyance. Unfortunately, something about the tune seemed naggingly familiar and Syaoran's mind kept picking it up at the chorus like... like... _like he should have known it from somewheres._ Syaoran growled and dropped his stance, spinning on his heel to glare Eriol down. "It was Sakura-san's favorite song." the mage answered before the question was asked, "Don't remember the name, only the tune. She used to sing it when she was alone." Eriol opened his eyes and gave Syaoran a meaningful stare, "You would know the title, wouldn't you?" Syaoran clenched his teeth, a bit angry with Eriol for being infuriating, a bit angry with himself for not knowing the song, "No. I wouldn't. I'm not even completely sure I've heard it before." "Nonsense. Of course you have." Eriol began humming again. Syaoran grumbled. "Would you stop that, I can't concentrate." "Well, yes. That would be the desired effect." Eriol tipped his glasses so that they caught the dim candlelight and hid his eyes, "I think that we need to talk." Syaoran sighed dramatically and sat, cross-legged, where he was, sword laid carefully across his knees, "So talk." Eriol made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a giggle, "I'm not the one that needs to talk. Go on, Li-kun, tell me why you're here." Syaoran raised his eyebrows, "I did tell you. I'm here to learn western magic." Eriol raised his eyebrows right back, "Oh, really? Come now, Li-kun, we both know that's a lie. Just another excuse. Tell me why you're really here." Syaoran didn't speak. He lowered his gaze and glowered at the floor. "Oh, how tragic!" Eriol exclaimed, "And the boy has no words with which to describe his suffering. He just keeps walking the length of the same broken circle, lies at one end and the horror of the truth at the other!" he shot Syaoran a wry look, "Have I waxed poetic enough, or would you like me to lament you plight further?" "How about you stop talking and we go back to that whole 'let's-teach-Li-kun-magic-like-we-were-suppose-to' arrangement. I liked that much better." Eriol folded his hands and acquired a wicked grin, "Well, we could do both you know." Syaoran groaned, "Oh no." "Li-kun, I have for you, a riddle..." ;Obedience "Is something bothering you?" {The same field as before, daytime. Eriol is reading quietly, Syaoran curled up in his lap like a child. Syaoran is supposed to be sleeping as he can never seem to get enough of it these days, but instead his eyes are half open staring at the sky.} "Um... no." "What's wrong?" {Syaoran lowers his eyes and lids them completely, mumbling.} "I was... thinking." "About Sakura?" {Eyes flicker open again. Dismay.} "An... wha... I mean... how...?" {Eriol smiles, ruffles Syaoran's hair.} "Just a whim. Something in your eyes told me. You're still worried about what I said, aren't you?" {Eyes flicker uncertainty.} "Mn... maybe." "They were just words, Little Wolf, nothing more." {Long pause. Syaoran closes his eyes and Eriol picks up his book and starts reading. He puts it down again and chuckles.} "You're... different, you know that Xiao Lang?" {Syaoran opens his eyes.} "Hmm?" {Eriol runs long fingers through the chinese boy's brown hair thoughtfully.} "When you fancy yourself in love with someone-" {Syaoran pulls away from Eriol's hand and sits up, tipping his head to the side in curiosity.} "- you let your defenses down. None of the gruff, abrasive violence, just the awkwardness. It's sort of sweet and... don't look at me like that, Xiao Lang. I'm simply stating an observation that to my eyes, you've changed a lot since-" {Syaoran blushes.} "- that night." {Eriol leans in, whispers.} "Almost as if you've been... tamed." {Syaoran doesn't seem to like this analogy one bit. Eriol chuckles and reaches out to touch him. Syaoran takes advantage of the moment to plant a rather clumsy kiss on Eriol's smiling lips. He wraps his fingers around Eriol's knee to steady himself and presses deeper into the kiss. Eriol breaks away suddenly, and picks up his book, not looking at Syaoran.} "I left off in the middle of a sentence." {Syaoran sighs, but obediently lays back in the grass. After a moment, he asks:} "Hiiragizawa, what do you suppose it's like being blind?" ;Judgement "... it all falls apart today." Syaoran woke up to a faint murmuring in his ear, breath on his neck and heat leaving his back. Eriol was already pulling on his robes and the clock read seven fifteen AM. Syaoran blinked, _'Clock? Since when was there a clock here?'_ the bedside table was familiar by now- the same three books, a glass of perpetually iced water and, if their owner happened to be residing in the bed, Eriol's glasses. Never a clock though. Syaoran thought it better not to ask questions. Instead he snatched up the glasses and placed them on Eriol's nose when the mage leaned in to kiss him. The mage nodded in thanks, but did not kiss him. "This is the final day. You have exactly eleven hours to figure out the riddle." Syaoran inhaled deeply, "Or what?" Eriol held his gaze for a few moments longer, then turned away without answering his question, "I'll expect to see you in the study by seven thirty. We have a lot of work to do today." he spared Syaoran a glance over the shoulder and gestured towards the bedside table, "You might want to take the clock with you, Li-kun." Syaoran jumped into his clothing and swung by the kitchen, surprised to see Ruby Moon ambling about, whistling happily to (well, to be fair) _herself_. She blinked at him and smiled. "Ah, Xiao Lang-kun!" she bubbled, "Want some breakfast?" she snickered, "Don't worry, Suppi cooked it, I'm just doing the dishes." "Uh..." Syaoran was rather confused at this point, "Just... um... give me some toast. Hiiragizawa told me to be in the study by seven thirty." he glanced at the clock. Seven twenty five. Did time really move so quickly? Ruby quickly provided him with toaster-fresh, buttered bread and he shoved it in his mouth, rushing towards the east exit of the kitchen. The guardian, however, stopped him short with a question, "You're leaving today, aren't you?" Syaoran turned slowly. Was he? "Mmph mnm mhpnmnm?" Ruby lifted her eyebrows, "Okay. Sure. Anyways, my point was it's quite a shame they're coming to fetch you already. You've only been here a day or so." Wait. There was something wrong there. As far as Syaoran knew, he'd been there at least three months. And who were _they?_ And _where exactly had_ Ruby and Suppi been this whole time? "Mphm mwrmph mpuo mphfing amfph?" "It's rude to talk with your mouth full, Xiao Lang." Ruby said breezily, returning her attention to the dishes. Syaoran made it to the downstairs study- still scarfing down toast and buttoning up the collar of his shirt- by seven thirty four. Eriol was unimpressed. "You're late, Li-kun." Syaoran wanted to ask what was with the sudden formalities, but something about Eriol's manner forbade questioning. Syaoran focused his mind, drew his sword and concentrated on his training. Questions would come later. Only later was apparently too late. Meiling was dressed head to toe in sky-blue trimmed with black, quite a contrast from her usual bold reds and golds. She was smiling sweetly, but something told Syaoran that there was a growl hidden beneath that smile, one that would only show itself once they were alone. "Pack your things, Xiao Lang." she stretched out all her words and smiled harder as if it were an effort of commendable self-restraint not to lash out and strangle him with Eriol standing right there, "I'm taking you home." Syaoran's breath caught in his throat and he nodded dumbly, remembering his conversation with Sakura in the hospital the day before he left. He almost asked Meiling which home she was taking him too but stopped himself short. It was a stupid question and she _definitely_ would have hit him upon hearing it asked. So instead, he turned and headed towards the guest bedroom that had been designated his (though he hadn't been sleeping there for nearly a month). He was stopped in the hallway by a familiar hand on his wrist, and was pulled into a loose and rather impersonal embrace. "Have you figured it out yet, Little Wolf?" Eriol murmured. Syaoran blinked, "What... oh, the riddle?" the mage stared expectantly, "I... I..." he looked at the floor, "I haven't really given it thought in a while." Eriol looked faintly disappointed, "Oh, that's unfortunate. I really did expect better of you, Xiao Lang but, I suppose..." "What was the answer?" Syaoran interrupted hastily. Eriol eyed him wearily and the chinese boy gulped, "Can't really be any harm in telling me now." Eriol sighed and released Syaoran's wrist, leaning back against the wall and adjusting his glasses, "You almost guessed it, I suppose I should give you that. Though I dropped clues almost constantly. You _really_ should have gotten it," Syaoran opened his mouth to reply, but decided the better of it. He let Eriol speak. "You said that this wasn't real- truthfully, you were half right. Nothing we said, did or experienced happened within a realm of time that actually existed. However, everything we said, did and experienced was in itself real." Eriol paused in contemplation, snapping his fingers moments later, "Do you remember that conversation we had about stars, Xiao Lang?" Syaoran nodded, "And how light travels at a speed too quick for us to contemplate?" another nod, "Yes, well, it was something like that." Syaoran nodded a third time, though more fully, to show that he understood. It explained everything, really, Ruby and Suppi's disappearance, the endless nights and Eriol's sudden obsession with time, only... "If you don't mind asking, exactly what speed were we moving at?" Eriol smiled sadly, "The speed of pain." he said. Then he disappeared. Syaoran packed quickly and headed to meet Meiling in the waiting room, where she was being entertained by the antics of a boisterous Ruby and an exasperated Suppi. He hitched his bags up over his shoulder and nodded to his cousin. She giggled and grinned and wished the guardians fond farewells and when the door shut she slapped Syaoran firmly across the face. "What the _hell_ do you think you're doing!? Good thing we caught you early. Running away like that- it's a wonder Hiirgizawa put up with you for three days and...!" her ranting dragged on into a long growl (the typical Li family growl. Syaoran knew it well, being one of it's most devout practitioners). Finally, she set her feet apart and firmly and said (as if it made all the difference in the world), "Anyways, Sakura would miss you." _'Ah'_ Syaoran thought, a small smile working it's way to his lips, _'That home.'_ {;e n d e} ;nomatterhowfaryou r u n itdoesnt change a THING . . .} :; :; :; :; **AFTERWORD AND AN EXPLAINATION:** Okay, I'd rather people just figure this one out for themselves, but I _know_ I'm going to get reviews asking me what exactly the hell is going on here (personally, I think it's quite clear, but hey). First of all, the story, as I noted earlier, was told out of sequence. This is the proper order of the sequences:  
Accidents, Hospital, Circle, Lessons, Words/Catalyst, Stars, Obedience, JugementM  
The plot, in a nutshell, is this: Sakura gets hurt and blinded in a magical accident. Syaoran doesn't feel as bad as he thinks he should so goes to train with Eriol because he's a wad and this is a slash fic. I write Eriol strange and sadistic, so things got weird and, as mentioned before, slashy. Eriol stopped time and stuff and then Meiling came and fixed everything. Sort of. The point is that it was a happy ending. Sort of. And I don't think you should need this to figure out the story, therefore I am being very vague. If you still don't get it, read it again. If you liked it, read it again. If your brain melted, review and complain and I'll try to... um... remedy that. Actually, that's a lie. I'll be going now.  
PS: _'The Speed of Pain'_ is a very good song (Marilyn Manson), unfortunately, it has absolutely nothing to do with this fic. However, this fic was inspired by two songs: _'Losing My Religion'_ by REM and _'Circle'_ by Sarah Mac Laughlin. Good music all around. I need to sleep. Goodnight.  
*sincerely  
Jenn Sparky Young aka Izzy Girl aka Cephied Variable  
cephied_variable@yoishness.zzn.com  
  
-started 24/7/03  
-finished 25/7/03, 3:34 AM 


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